Interview with Nicholas Shane Kouns, May 19, 2011

Partial Transcript: It's May nineteenth, 2011. We're in Lexington, Kentucky, with, uh, Nick Kouns. And we're doing an interview for the Queer in Appalachia, uh, interview for the Nunn Center.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about growing up in a small town and hiding his homosexuality.

Keywords: Fathers; Football; Gambling; Mothers; Russell (Ky.); Sisters; Sports

Subjects: Appalachian Region, Southern--Social life and customs.; Gay youth; Gays and sports; Parents of gays.; Rural families

Partial Transcript: It was tragic, I think for me, in a lot of ways, because I felt so alone. I mean th-, you know, that's, I think, typical to a lot of gay men in Appalachia.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about learning to fight. Talks about getting into trouble during teen years.

Keywords: Alcohol; DUI; Drinking; Fighting; High schools; Isolation; Lonely; Secrecy

Subjects: Gay teenagers.

Partial Transcript: I had no sexual relationships with men, um, would not until I was 21 and was in Greece, on a fellowship, after I had graduated from college. I mean I had to leave the country for me to feel safe, um, being sexually intimate with a man.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about his first sexual experience with a man. Talks about sexual experiences with women.

Keywords: Centre College; Colleges; Greece; Watson Fellowship

Subjects: Bisexuality.; Gay men--Sexual behavior.; Homosexuality--Social aspects.

Partial Transcript: What about your first sexual experience with a man back home?

Segment Synopsis: Talks about deciding to come out to friends. Talks about maintaining difficult relationships.

Keywords: Education; Friends; Hometowns; Relationships

Subjects: Coming out (Sexual orientation); Gay couples.; Gay men--Sexual behavior.

Partial Transcript: I don't know if it was the right thing or not, um. For me it was. You know. Given that my father was a paradigm of masculinity.

Segment Synopsis: Talks about experiences with father's poker games. Talks about what he learned from his father.

Keywords: Ethics; Fathers; Gambling; Morality; Poverty; Wealth; Work

Subjects: Appalachian Region, Southern--Social life and customs.; Gay teenagers.; Parents of gays.

Partial Transcript: And my dad just went out, he couldn't afford my sister's medicine, so he went out with a crowbar and started, um, tearing public pay phones off of the, off of their stands, out of the phone booths.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about events that taught him loyalty to family. Talks about how that loyalty pertains to other types of relationships.

Keywords: Coming out; Cultures; Morality; Poverty; Sisters

Subjects: Appalachian Region, Southern--Social life and customs.; Gay men--Sexual behavior.; Gays--Family relationships.

Partial Transcript: Let's go back to the, the point where you're talking about, um, you noticed there were some guys who were very obviously, uh, gay, but painfully so, you know. Did you, what is it that you had that they didn't?

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about his fear of being ridiculed and learning how to be perceived as a straight man.

Keywords: Athletes; Emulating; Fathers; Footballs; Friends; Imitation

Subjects: Appalachian Region, Southern--Social life and customs.; Gay teenagers.; Gays and sports; Homosexuality--Social aspects.; Rural families

Partial Transcript: That would transition into college as well. Um, I played football in college, at Centre, I was a scholarship kid. Um, and then, after, I guess, my sophomore year, quit the football team because I needed to work on my grades.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about sexual experiences while traveling after college. Discusses his attitudes towards sex.

Keywords: Athletes; Football; Growth; Intimacy; Locations; Maturity; Writers

Subjects: Gay men--Sexual behavior.; Gays--Identity; Homosexuality and education.

Partial Transcript: And as a physician, there is a, there's a certain liability with coming out as being an openly gay man, especially in a small town like Winchester, Kentucky.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about how he came to be comfortable with being out. Talks about how his situation makes others more accepting of his homosexuality.

Keywords: Approval; Communities; Opinions; Small towns; Wealth

Subjects: Appalachian Region, Southern--Social life and customs.; Coming out (Sexual orientation); Homosexuality in the workplace.

Partial Transcript: Do you, uh, did you have any, um, what did you build your concept of gayness off of when you were young? Like, did you have any examples? Either in the media, or...?

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about how gay men were portrayed in the media when he was young. Talks about trying to be what he thought he was supposed to be.

Keywords: Acceptance; Athletes; Colleges; Drinking; Loneliness; Openly gay; Relief; Secrecy; Sports

Subjects: Gay men--United States.; Gays--Identity.; Homosexuality--Social aspects.

Partial Transcript: I don't know, I guess the real question is would I change anything. Absolutely not. I mean, do I wish that it would have been easier for me? I mean, you know, possibly.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about how the hardships of his youth drove him to help others. Talks about the need for integration of straight and gay communities in Appalachia.

Keywords: Acceptance; Ashland (Ky.); Awareness; Gay Straight Alliance; Guidance; Role models

Subjects: Appalachian Region, Southern--Social life and customs.; Gay community; Homosexuality--Social aspects.

Partial Transcript: Coming out is inevitable. You either die, and it t-turns into this twisted, nasty, hateful, bitter thing. More of a wasting away. You die from the inside out and become resentful.

Segment Synopsis: Nick talks about the need for homosexuals to be open about their sexuality. Talks about his own coming out experience. Talks about defining "coming out." The interview is concluded.

Keywords: Colleges; Definitions; Experiences; Homophobia; Role models; Rural; Sexuality

Subjects: Closeted gays.; Coming out (Sexual orientation); Gay culture.